Each year I attempt to take 2-3 days for a personal retreat from my normal, busy world. I don’t always succeed—but the routine is a good one. It is not a “super-spiritual” retreat with total silence, only fruit and granola and a Bible. No, I am too worldly for that….
My retreats include three areas: Spiritual, Personal and Ministry. I bring lots of things to “do” in each area—more than I could do in a week of retreats!! But, I live in the tension of the possible, and see what God brings to the surface. I have a computer—and am writing this now as I sit in my room. It is not a total exclusion of the world around me, but the time stops me enough to remind me of some things.
In this tradition is always silence. No radios, TVs, ipods or internet. Silence….that mysterious space we so often avoid. As an extrovert, I process information verbally, grow spiritually in conversations, get energy in connections and simply enjoy interactions with other people. But, as always, we are called into new territory if growth is our real concern. To do the same thing is not always a bad thing—but it is a bad thing to never do a new thing.
And so silence is part of my new thing each year. Not that I don’t do silence during the year—it is just a more intentional, extended, deep and reflective silence I experience here. It draws me and repels me at the same time. My insecurities creep to the surface and begin to whisper in my ear. My hurts surprise me with the fact that there remains some healing that I may have ignored. My fears and lack of faith in God—the real, honest lack of faith…not the false, verbal assurances I proclaim in public—haunt me around the edges of the silence.
But, there is healing inside the whispering, the haunting and surprises. There is truth to be heard—real truth spoken to the soul. There is a rock we can be sure of when our life feels shaky. It is what we long for, but often miss.
Youth ministry is a loud, fast world. I love it—and the people who inhabit that world. Thanks for being one of them. But, I worry about our souls because the whisper of God is often missed in the volume, the pace and the vast amounts of pizza. If you are a disciplined, reflective introvert reading this—please be patient with the rest of us. If you are a normal youth worker who complains because you are feeling dry today—stop complaining and get your calendar out. Make a day, or at least a half-day to go away. Find a retreat center, or a friends church with a small chapel. Don’t do a coffee shop, your house or your office…it always sounds like a good idea, but doesn’t work for this kind of intentional silence. Break free to STOP…and see what happens.
You might be pleased and bothered by it all. But, you will have stopped—and that is good in itself. Listen for the quiet whisper of God telling you that He is with you, loves you and still wants to use you. Be willing to hear the challenge from God that we can so easily ignore in the busyness. Whatever it is, stop and listen. Stop and listen.
Peace in Christ, Tiger
The ancient fathers of the church understood this silence very well. One of the things that you see in history about the saints who helped people in great ways was the preliminary period of silence and preparation that they went through, often being in seclusion for years. Once they "emerged", they then counseled thousands of people from dawn to dusk, and then prayed for much of the night. Not an easy life, but one that was dedicated to God and neighbor.
ReplyDeleteDear Anonymous,
ReplyDeletethanks for your perspective. While I appreciate the ancient fathers--and all that they can teach us--it is clear that for most of us, it is a VERY different world that we live in. What can we learn in our fast-paced, technological, distracting world that pulls us from that to a period of silence? HOW can we hear the whisper of God in this crazy culture? Most of us don't go in seclusion for years--but, then we use that as an excuse to not find SOME way to break free and stop.
Thanks.
There are many 'traditions' or 'styles' that can help us in this.. personally I find the Taize and Celtic Christian Spirituality approaches very helpful.
ReplyDeleteCulture plays a big part and what our church traditions are.. if you don't have a lot of liturgy in your normal church/spiritual life this can be helpful. There are lots of books on praying in the style of... these have proved helpful to me. Thomas A Kempis's book "Imitation of Christ" is a real gem and everyone should read it at least once in their journey.
Yes we are very BUSY but s were our forefathers. Many worked long hard days 6 days a week and yet managed to pray every day and devote themselves to prayer and a godly life on Sundays. Many walked miles to and from work, had little sleep and concepts such as 'burn out' were unknown to them. Sometimes we make too many excuses and I do wonder when we get to heaven how will we feel when we meet our brothers and sisters from earlier times or different cultures (African/Asian etc?) and see their testimony?
Not wanting to be critical here, just aware that a 'Western' perspective is not always the only one.
Peace and Blessings In Christ the Lord.